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Sometimes, research can really connect the dots.

When it comes to online dating, a recent study of 41,000 men by Queensland University of Technology found that guys don’t get selective about their dating choices, placing more emphasis on commonalities and education levels, until they are in their 40s. Comparatively, women are picky from the jump. While an anything-goes attitude can make dating more fun, it can also make finding the right one a bit more challenging. Knowing you’re not focused on the right things is helpful, but the game changer is figuring out what you should be looking for. Here are some things experts say you should consider.

1 Can You Just Kick It?

Compatibility isn’t about being into the exact same hobbies or shows. It’s about being friends. Do you enjoy engaging in conversation? Can you try different things and be happy simply because you’re spending time with this person? Does the give and take feel fair? These are indicators of a good vibe.

2 Cash, Money

Financial compatibility is a big component of a relationship’s success. If one partner is a saver and the other is a spender it may seem like the relationship is destined to fail, but that’s not the case. Success isn’t based on habit, but the decision to share priorities, unify goals and work as a team.

3 How Well Do You Communicate?

It’s all good until that first argument. That is when you find out whether you can talk through an issue without being disrespectful and effectively problem solve together.

4 Intimacy Is Everything

Think beyond sex. How connected do you feel to this person? Do you look forward to sharing your day, discussing your ambitions, or venting about disappointments? Then you can think about the whole getting it in part. Does sex feel like a chore or overly clumsy? Can you talk to each other about what you want, and deliver? Yeah, that part.