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Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump campaigns in Charlotte

Source: Charlotte Observer / Getty

News that Omarosa Manigault Newman was leaving her position as White House aide for the Trump administration wasn’t met with a chorus of “finally”— the sentiment was actually a bit more like “stay gone.” Folks even poked fun at the former reality star with memes featuring her getting dragged out.

The reason? Omarosa isn’t liked much by the masses. From her mean girl days on The Apprentice to her support of a president widely deemed sexist and racist, Omarosa’s popularity has long been based on her ability to pique interest by mastering contrary behavior. While her story makes headlines due to her public persona, there are Omarosas (both female and male) everywhere.  And while their presence may be annoying to others, imagine how challenging it is to know you are widely disliked, especially if you want to start on the road to change—stories have suggested that Omarosa could no longer handle being affiliated with the controversial administration.

Change is hard for everyone, but when you’re placed in an unpopular box it’s even more difficult. So what can the detested do when they want to make amends or have a new start? If you’re looking to reboot after a long run in the “jerk lane” or know someone who fits the bill, read on.


1 Start Being Nice

Sounds simple because it is. The first thing you have to do is start showing folks that there is a new you. Be sincere, but purposeful. Be extremely mindful and thoughtful about what you say. Think beyond personal wins and focus on the collective.


2 Make Amends

Sorry goes a long way. If you’ve been specifically horrible to certain folks it’s time to take an L and apologize. Write a note. Say my bad in person. Just take responsibility for your action, or actions, and make it known that you plan to do and be better.


3 Go Social

A lot of folks make insensitive or intentionally provocative statements on their social media pages. If you’re ready to change, use the medium to start letting folks know about the new energy you’re putting in the universe. And it doesn’t have to be a sappy message! There are scores of memes and gifs that can relay new sentiments, making it clear that times have changed.


4 Grand Gesture

Big reveals are always a great way to shift energy. If you’ve been a jerk at the office, buy a box of coffee and donuts for the team—and say my bad. If you’ve been difficult with bae try a week of flowers and cards. Determine what best suits your audience and do it big— that way they know you’re serious.


5 Refine Your Defense Game

Making amends is cool, but the biggest change has to happen within. Many people hit the “rude” or “get mine at all costs” button when they feel challenged, inept or scared. Being mean is often a maladaptive coping mechanism to anxiety. Figure out other ways to process and release that emotion.  Maybe it requires a brief timeout to gather your thoughts. Perhaps you exercise to get the energy out. Maybe you take a quick stretch or deep breath. Figure out what works for you.